Picket fences hid widespread laundry operation

If there is one thing I know about the suburbs, it is that things aren't always what they seem.

From the outside everything may look tidy and above reproach, but inside? Your neighbors are having sex with their gardeners. Or running a large scale marijuana franchise out of the master bedroom.

But whose grass is really greener?

That's what Peyton Price set out to discover.

For years now, she's been following us in the car pool line, digging into our flowerbeds and peering into the smoke-filled back rooms of the PTA. She has stood on the sidelines and looked into the lunchboxes. She knows what's hiding beneath our couch cushions.

She knows what's taped to the front of our giant refrigerators: Orthodontist 3 p.m. Don't Forget! Is anyone ever going to empty the dishwasher?? It's a rhetorical question. She knows that too.

My point is, Peyton Price knows things, if you know what I mean.

And now, she's telling all in a little pink book that lays it out, three lines at a time. In haiku. I'm not saying it's true. And I'm not saying it's not. I'm just saying it might be a good idea if we tried to buy up a few copies. Like maybe all of them.

Click on the pretty pink book for more details.