Oh god. You know that woman who googles "Pop-Tarts" late at night and then hits the "send" button on two 36-count boxes of strawberry frosted Pop-Tarts for delivery to a dorm room 2,015.3 miles away? And then googles "dorm room toaster" to see if there is something small and safe that can be used to toast strawberry frosted Pop-Tarts in a dorm room? Because those are his favorite? And then googles "are toasters allowed in college dorms?" Because what if they're not? And then worries, will he even eat 72 strawberry frosted Pop-Tarts if he can't toast them?
If I am not careful, I could turn into that woman.
Photo: Little Ernie gets a taste of dorm life.
Last thing I said when we pulled out of the dorm parking lot last night---oh God, we only left him with one box of pop tarts. Never mind the $6K meal plan with thousands of all you can eat choices or the literally dozens of food sources along his path to that first class. Never mind that both the 5 Starbucks and 1 Einsteins and the Bookstore and the Trading Post all have his favorite items in stock. I somehow left him with only ONE box of pop tarts! I have to go back...
Posted by: nthnglsts | August 26, 2013 at 04:33 AM
I sent Pop-Tarts and no toaster. Also, I relied upon the girl to tell me that strawberry frosted Pop-Tarts were his favorite. Because I didn't even know. (Chokes back sob.) What kind of a mother doesn't even know her son's favorite flavor of Pop-Tarts? Even the Suburban Executive could probably tell you that and she delegates everything.
Also, the girl didn't know I was going to have them shipped directly so she probably told me HER favorite flavor in the belief that she could hijack them between here and California. I probably fell for the OLDEST TRICK in the world.
I don't know what any of us were even thinking having teenagers. Or letting them go to college. I have to go back to L.A...
SK
Posted by: Suburban Kamikaze | August 26, 2013 at 06:42 AM
And while we're here - or are we? - I came across this little gem from the archives:
http://www.suburbankamikaze.com/suburban_kamikaze/2011/08/roads-where-were-going-we-dont-need-roads-dr-emmett-brown-back-to-the-future.html
And by "little" I mean really long. By "gem" I mean, every word worth reading.
SK
Posted by: Suburban Kamikaze | August 26, 2013 at 07:16 AM
So, first you freak out over his lack of Pop-Tarts, rely on unreliable information from what could be his sworn enemy, order far too many, freak out over his lack of toaster and then feel the need to rush back out to him to fix it all?
SK, I don't know how to tell you this but . . . *whispers* I think your Mom-ness is showing.
Posted by: Gigi | August 26, 2013 at 03:49 PM
That is a nice way of putting it.
SK
Posted by: Suburban Kamikaze | August 26, 2013 at 07:28 PM
My son is also a freshman at USC this year, and I also looked into sending him a mega pack of pop tarts....the new peanut butter ones that are already a rip off because they only have three packs per box rather than four! I just found your blog and look forward to following it.
Posted by: Rebecca | September 07, 2013 at 07:03 AM
We will blanket that campus with Pop-Tarts. Somebody at Whoever Makes Pop-Tarts Inc. should be paying us.
SK
Posted by: Suburban Kamikaze | September 07, 2013 at 10:46 AM