Pretty much everything. Along with stuff in every other color.
It's on the counters, the floors, the staircase, the beds. It's stuffed into the bookshelves and under the couch cushions. It's piling up around the laundry baskets. It's spilling out of the trash bag.
We are living under conditions often described as "Holy crap, who lives like this?"
Or "sloth" for short.
Some of us may have taken on too many projects at the same time. Others are expected to take a key supporting role in everybody else's projects as well.
And of course, by "some of us" I mean myself. By "others," I am referring to myself again. By "supporting role," I mean, "Can't anybody around here do a single thing for themselves? Also: prep work, inspiration, execution, fact-checking, copyediting, scheduling, transportation and what we loosely refer to as "meal planning." Very loosely.
And sure, thumbtacks are a big part of making it work. But a key drawback to the many organizational systems that I have devised over the years is that they contribute to the sense that any of this is actually possible.
Related: Like you have a better system
Oh dear god! It sounds (and looks) like my house!!!!!
And I have to ask....am I (and you) the only ones who actually DO anything around here?
Don't answer that. I already know the answer. *sigh*
Posted by: Gigi | October 16, 2012 at 04:37 PM
OMG! The scene on your kitchen table is exactly why Al Gore invented the internet.
Posted by: nthnglsts | October 16, 2012 at 06:27 PM
I'm pretty sure the Internet was invented so people would stop reading newspapers and get all their news from Lindsay Lohan's Twitter feed.
SK
Posted by: Suburban Kamikaze | October 17, 2012 at 07:56 AM
Our house is also in the state you describe.
However, I think the photo "evidence" might be doctored. It is clearly a photo that should be titled "Graduate School, Sunday 1996." You can't fool me: there are bagels and cream cheese tucked under one of those stacks. And the happy, carefree readers of all that newspaper have just stepped into the kitchen to pour themselves a third cup of hot coffee that they will drink to the end while it is still hot because no child will spill it or distract them (for three hours) mid-sip.
Now, if there were some glitter-related art on that table too? Or yellowed newspaper from two years ago at the bottom of the "to file" stack? Or somebody's lunchbox leftovers from last Tuesday? Or a note scrawled in crayon to a teacher on the back of a mostly-clean half-sheet of paper? THEN, I would buy the evidence.
Posted by: MommyTime | October 17, 2012 at 11:56 AM
Glitter art and lunchbox scraps are KEEPSAKES compared to what teenagers leave lying around the house. It is the difference between what you might unearth in the basement of MoMA - versus what you might unearth in the basement of a crime lab. You're going to want to use gloves.
SK
Posted by: Suburban Kamikaze | October 17, 2012 at 01:00 PM
"I'm pretty sure the Internet was invented so people would stop reading newspapers and get all their news from Lindsay Lohan's Twitter feed."
Nice. Very nice.
Posted by: Jess | October 18, 2012 at 04:18 AM
Let's see Lindsay Lohan's Twitter Feed do this! http://www.yesterdaysnews.com/
Posted by: nthnglsts | October 21, 2012 at 08:48 AM
I think you have just written the newspaper industry's next advertising campaign.
SK
Posted by: Suburban Kamikaze | October 21, 2012 at 04:31 PM