First Place: Girl Kamikaze for "I need you to take me shopping for shoes to match the dress I may or may not wear to Homecoming." Degree of Urgency: It's Homecoming! Also she is apparently the last girl on the planet without The Perfect Shoes.
First Runner Up: Boy Esq. for "I need you to talk me through the process of finding the collander as you drive to work, because the pasta is almost ready and I can't find it. Also, after you tell me it's in the dishwasher, I will need you to tell me whether the dishes in the dishwasher are clean or dirty even though you are in the car and I am standing right next to it." Degree of Urgency: The pasta needs to be drained Now. Also, he is Starving to Death. Again.
Second Runner Up: Mr. Kamikaze for "I need you to come to the basement and hold this bucket under the pipe while I test whether water is going to spray out all over you as I make some plumbing adjustments." Degree of Urgency: None whatsoever. The bucket in this scenario is just a prop to enlist my cooperation.