1. Get your mom to take you and a friend to your favorite pizza restaurant for lunch. Right after breakfast.
2. Order the mozzarella sticks right away because your mom's ability to say "no" is weakest at the beginning of the meal. At this point she still believes there is a chance you will actually eat everything you say you can eat. Also, she is distracted by the wine list.
3. As soon as your appetizers arrive, count them and divide them as carefully as if you were stranded on a desert island with those kids from Lord of the Flies instead of in an Italian restaurant with one other 14-year-old girl and your mom's credit card at 11:30 in the morning.
4. Order the deep dish cheese pizza with the cheese-stuffed crust. Because the more cheese the better.
5. Leave the crusts on your plate. Because nobody eats the crusts.
6. Finish with the signature "deep dish cookie" dessert. Because that is the reason you picked this restaurant in the first place. Duh.
7. Ask the waiter to box up the rest of your pizza. Then leave it on the table for your mom to carry.
8. Wait about three hours before asking, "what's for dinner?" When your mom says "leftover pizza," look at her like she just said something really crazy. Because that is just crazy.
A second helping of this topic: How to feed 4 teenagers for 2 weeks for under $1 million