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Personally I would think that the watermelon costume would be such a shining beacon of hope in the face of a film like this that Mr. SK wouldn't be able to keep his hands off you. But that just goes to show you what I know about angsty eastern European cinema and its relative position vis a vis humble produce. (However, I would be glad to write you an abstract for a scholarly article on the subject, so long as you appreciate terms such as mise en scene.)

Suburban Sheepdog

Subtitles? Tell me there were subtitles.

Inga: You have eaten all the cabbage.

Jan: I do not like cabbage.

Inga: Even so, you have eaten all the cabbage. Now we will surely starve.

Jan: Death is at our door. He seeks cabbage.

Inga: We have none to give him.

Jan: Perhaps we can give him watermelon instead.

Inga: The watermelon all was taken by sarcastic suburban mommy bloggers for use in ironic pictures meant to illustrate their bourgeoisie midwestern sexual disaffection.

Jan: Then we will die

Suburban Kamikaze

Mostly there was wind, and music so forlorn it is a wonder people did not kill themselves right there in the theater. It really was a fine bit of angsty Eastern European filmmaking. But would a little bourgeois sexual innuendo have been so wrong? And some sun?


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