Storm warnings call for a little Midwestern pluck

I was inclined to discount the increasingly dramatic weather warnings as hype.

Then I get a call from the salon suggesting that I move my bikini wax up because a blizzard is on the way.

Now I am scared.

I lived through three decades worth of hurricane preparation in Florida and never once was I instructed to have my pubic hair removed.

You cannot match these Midwesterners for preparedness, apparently.

 

From the Midwestern Diary archives: Heartland Horoscope

Comments

[Audubon Ron]

I'm talking about penis stretching exercises in my blog and you're talk about pubic hair removal in yours. These are the important issues I suppose I would never thought necessary for which all those accounting classes would lead.

[Suburban Kamikaze]

I am actually talking about storm preparation Audubon. Though I don't know how they do it in NOLA.

SK

[MommyTime]

Nice headline, btw, what with the pluck and all. My personal (salon) storm preparation is tending more towards touching up my roots end, but I can think of no headline grabbing pun associate with "warm chestnut red brown." I guess that's why I'm not a journalist and you are.

[Michael]

Well, one never knows how long one will be trapped inside...and how much intimacy that cabin fever might lead to. So best to be presentable.

[Sue]

I assume you have your beaver pelt ready to slap in place, or didn't anyone tell you about that part of the procedure? Because this is the Midwest, otherwise you'd be kind of cold.
If this doesn't get me banned from SK nothing will.

[Suburban Kamikaze]

Banned? We are giving you your own column. We're calling it Wisconsin Wednesdays: Midwestern Survival and Cocktail Recipes.

SK

[Suburban Sheepdog]

Well, I understand that the wax is warm, right? Maybe that accounts for it.

Not that we don't have our own winter issues down here. Had to convince the small boy today that sunscreen would be required for his field trip to the Everglades.