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I have nothing witty to say -- but I do have sympathy for the state of the under-the-cushions. And for the cutting comments.


You vacuum under the couch cushions? You guys need a dog


Is 14 too young to be sent away to a forced labor camp in China? (Ha. Ha. Obviously, my question is a joke: I know for a fact 14's not too young.)

PS-I have one of my own...a 14 year old, that is. Not a forced labor camp. (Sorry if I got your hopes up.)


Time for a little couch cushion detente. Move the TV to a family room (that I order you to create) in the basement. Voila! no more Doritos down the sofa. No more drinks on the hardbacks. No more half-eaten candy on the carpet. You get your room back. Then find something you both love doing, like eating and do it together, just the two of you, at least once a month. That should do it. I accept Visa, Mastercard and home made Tapas from your kitchen...

Suburban Kamikaze

Perfect. We will reward him by creating a room just for him, where he can continue to cultivate the very special charm of teenage boys raised in front of television screens in basements. If only you had a daughter, I would begin planning their wedding this very minute...


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