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Audubon Ron

I have two vacuum cleaners. One, a canister to do the lino. Her name is Shelia. I’ve had Sheila for maybe 30 years now. She is really a big wad of duck tape and plastic at this point. Me and Sheila been around longer than both my marriages. Then there is Doris. Doris is a Hoover up-right and kicks ass on carpet, but lino, not so much. She is a wad of electrical tape and plastic. I thought about getting her a tattoo once. I know what you mean, can’t live without those girls. I’m a hopeless romantic that way.

Mr Lady

I have a Dyson. If I was physically capable, I'd have sex with it. Well, if it was physically capable and wouldn't end up in a back alley hysterectomy.

Anyway, I had a point and that point is that vacuums are sexy. The end.


I LOOOOVE my Dyson (although not in Mr Lady's Biblical sense). But I say if you want a vacuum for Mother's Day, you should have a vacuum--though I do understand how a husband might be leery of that desire being a trick.


My friend Ruth asked her husband to put up a window box for mother's day. She didn't want him buying something expensive. So far he has bought her a horse and a trip to Paris, which she paid for. She can't afford any more presents from him. So the kids primed the window box, her daughter painted the first coat, and her husband, who watched hockey for three and a half hours, bitched that because he had to work on the window box he didn't get to spend any time with her on Mother's day. The window box is still in the garage. Don't ya just love Mother's Day?


Mother's Day is such a minefield. It should be outlawed.

Suburban Kamikaze

Who knew there was so much love for vacuum cleaners out there? I must be doing it all wrong.



Ice cream sounds good to me! Mint chocolate chunk from Ben and Jerry's....who can beat that?


I have that Hoover, I love it.


I'm eating ice cream as I type-- it's delicious! I have a vacuum but it's some cheap one...works okay though!

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